Alice
O. Howell
At the Pub: Soliloquy of the fallen Priest of Tralee
So! So. So?
So, I am drunk
and I am going to the fire
and leaning over it
puttin' me face to the flame.
I feel the burning
of life wanting to live
and I feel the penance
of mockery -
and I ask, indeed, I do:
who would die for me
besides meself?
No one! Not today! Not anyone!
So! So. So?
So they must be canonizin'
a new saint, entirely
one that shouts and drools
or passes out
and prays withal -
I believe! I love! I'm here
cursed by me own existence!
So! So. So -
Ye should honour the mocker
for his despair
cos he will compromise
with necessity
and excel
and damn himself for doin' it
not seeing that Christ himself
went the hard way
finding the courage in losing
knowin’ it the only way
in the end
to win.
So! So. So?
Now don't ye see that?
a.o.howell